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There are certainly times when all of us wish we could just go into a shop and ask for 'a pound of self confidence please' (or rather, 500 grams of self confidence!).
And there are other times when it feels as if we could do anything, take on any project, deal with any problem.
So what is self confidence?
And just how can we get some when we've run out or just aren't feeling up to par?
It can be as (if not more) important to look at how your self confidence can be undermined or lost as opposed to trying to work out how to get it.
When people are wrong-footed or tripped up that's the time when they'll feel de-skilled, demoralised and unconfident.
It only takes one episode where someone is humiliated, embarrassed, caught 'napping', not quite sure what to do next, and any self confidence they had goes right out the window (and then is really hard to get back).
It's the difficult or tricky situations that erode self confidence, and though it might be a lovely fantasy to imagine going through life avoiding such situations, it's simply not possible.
They're out there lurking, waiting to trip you up anyway.
Once you identify the kinds of issues and scenarios that undermine your self confidence, and as importantly, identify the things you can do to change those situations.
Then you are truly on the way to developing a stronger, more solid self confidence.
Practising self confidence
A good place to start is with those things you know you have some ability to deal with.
What you are looking to do is get a series of small 'wins', events where you feel you've tried something out and made it work for you.
For example, returning something to a shop.
Find a shop with a guaranteed returns policy, then buy something you are not sure you want.
Next day return armed with your receipt and return the item.
This may sound small and contrived, but it is the way to practice self confidently doing what you've decided you want to do in this world.
As you go on practising, you will get more wins, and more wins means a feeling of success which automatically creates a gain in self confidence.
Gaining and developing self confidence underlies all our work.
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